Sunday, June 27, 2010

Upacara Pecah Dara Kereta Member Di Melaka

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Matahari cerah tanpa kelibat awan hitam.Dari tingkat 9 kelihatan warga UiTM sibuk dengan tugas dan jadual harian mereka.

Namun bagi aku,penantian memang satu penyeksaan.Bila janji pukul 12 tapi sekarang dah nak pukul 1 memang merengsakan.Lantas aku ambil tindakan nekad blah dari situ cancel appointment dengan supervisor.

Tindakan nekad itu disusuli dengan kerja gila mesej kawan-kawan ajak pergi Melaka.Sebab kawan pun gila maka semua setuju sebulat suara tanpa bantahan.

Lebih kurang pukul 3 kami keluar dari plaza tol memasuki lebuhraya utara-selatan.Member baru beli kereta baru jadi upacara pecah dara kereta member dimasukkan sekali dalam agenda.

Aksi-aksi 180km/j keatas berleluasa sepanjang perjalanan pergi.Nasib baik dah mengucap dua kalimah syahadah jadi kalau eksiden mati terus dalam Islam.

Tiba di plaza tol Ayer Keroh 45 minit kemudian dengan semua bersyukur sebab masih diberi kenikmatan bertaubat.

Boleh dikatakan selain pecah dara kereta member,perjalanan kali ini berkonsepkan jalan-jalan cari makan.Asal berhenti jer makan.Asal makan jer berhenti.Jadi sebab ada sorang member sarat mengandung mengidam nak makan coconut shake maka destinasi pertama Pantai Klebang.

Ok ini sumpah tak tipu.Coconut shake dia memang terbaik.Bayangkan air kelapa asli yang baru dibuka,dicampur sekali isinya,ditambah 6 scoop aiskrim perisa vanila dan diblend lumat penuh gaya.Ah! cite saja tak guna kalau tak pergi rasa sendiri baru tahu perasaan ejakulasi selain waktu beromen.


Memang terbaik! Err...abaikan peha Puyat dalam gambar


Kalau tengok kedai dia memang macam gerai-gerai tepi jalan biasa tapi orang yang beratur macam nak beli tiket wayang cite box-office.


Kedai dia biasa jer tapi orang yang beratur memang luar-biasa


Tekak yang kering dengan munajat dan mengucap sepanjang perjalanan tadi telah dibasahkan maka epik pengembaraan pecah dara kereta member diteruskan dengan hala tuju ke bandar.

Perut mengelodak dengan asid memaksa kami mencari kedai makan.Mujurlah Habib selaku penunjuk jalan memang kuat makan jadi tempat makan sedap memang takde masalah langsung dibandar Melaka ini.

Destinasi yang bakal kami tuju ini terletak diseberang sungai Kampung Morten berdekatan dengan kampus bandar UiTM.

Kedai dia memang tiada tarikan penari bogel atau muzik dangdut tapi warga emas banyak berkunjung ke kedai itu.Boleh kata kami saja orang muda yang lepak situ.Warga emas melepak disitu sambil bermain dam.Konsepnya 1 Malaysia.Cina,India,Melayu semua sama-sama beriadah main dam diselang-seli dengan pertaruhan atau istilah dalam Islamnya,JUDI.

Jadi kami pergi mamposkan warga emas disitu baik makan dari buat dosa mengumpat makan daging liat.Aku order mee goreng basah,Puyat order mee bandung,manakala Habib dan Ajib diet sebab gemuk.Hoii!! memang terbaik la mee goreng basah dia sampai dua orang diet tadi cancel program diet mereka.


Orang diet tak jadi diet


Bila jasmani telah dipenuhi,keperluan rohani pula perlu diisi.Jadinya kami solat Asar di surau Kampung Morten.

Kampung Morten terletak dipinggir Sungai Melaka.Kalau dari tepi jalanraya memang akan nampak rumah style lama zaman kesultanan Melayu Melaka.Kebanyakan penduduknya disitu ramah-tamah yang walaupun berada dalam arus kemodenan globalisasi tapi adat resam nilai-nilai murni masih terpahat di generasi kini.Kau orang tanya soalan bodoh macam "Ini rumah pakcik ker?" sambil orang tua itu terang-terang tengah melepak depan rumah dia pun akan dilayan mesra.


Rumah dibelakang itu berusia 100 tahun


Tangga rumah nie takde paku tapi dia pakai pasak jer


Suasana di Kampung Morten bagi rumah yang moden sikit


Memang tidak lengkap kunjungan ke Melaka jika tidak ambik gambar dekat A Famosa jadi kami melengkapkan epik pengembaraan pecah dara kereta member kami dengan ambil gambar sekitar situ.Eh korang tengok jerla gambar apajadah semua nak aku cerita tak belajo sejarah ker lahanat? (slang Melaka).


Parking dekat muzium apantah nama dia


Ajib semput naik tangga


Aku dan patung kudung


Gambar nak macam cover album


Batu-batu ditepi dinding ini dikatakan oleh Ajib sebagai portal ke dunia lain.Liancau!


Monumen bersejarah tanda pernah dijajah


Sepasang kekasih dihadapan air pancut


Sepasang err...kekasih? dihadapan bunga


Tajuk gambar ini:Dalam kandungan


Padahal pedang plastik jer tue


Lepas itu kami pergi lepak dekat Dataran Pahlawan sementara menunggu acara utama tujuan sebenar kedatangan kami.

Melalui pemerhatian,bilangan awek di Dataran Pahlawan semasa kedatangan kami susut mendadak jadi hipotesis semakin banyak budak UiTM masuk mendaftar,semakin banyak awek di Dataran Pahlawan kami rencanakan.

Sambil melepak di padang rumput Dataran Pahlawan kebanyakan perbualan berkisar kepada perihal senaman menguatkan tenaga batin dan bicara dari hati ke hati.


Tengah sibuk cite pasal senaman 'Phoenix membelah langit' yang dibaca dalam Kamasutra


Sebenarnya belakang tue ada awek tapi bila kami datang diorang terus balik.


Tiba-tiba Habib mencadangkan untuk beristirehat dalam Dataran Pahlawan sambil menikmati urutan kaki tapi cadangan itu ditolak sebulat suara termasuk pencadang sendiri sebaik saja terlihat akan bapok-bapok saiz gergasi ajak urut dekat kedai mereka.Gila apa body-to-body massage?

Jadi sebab nak jimatkan kos kami urut dekat kerusi urut game arcade jerla.Baru RM1.


video


Dalam pukul 8 lebih,dan bila tak tahan asyik kena ngorat dek bapok gergasi dalam salon maka kami mengorak langkah menuju ke Umbai bagi menikmati hidangan laut segar.

Di Umbai kami memilih satu kedai bertajuk Parameswara yang diambil sempena nama pengasas Melaka.Kelibat orang ramai dah macam cuti sekolah tambah pelik bila banyak kereta plat KL dan Singapura menimbulkan tanda-tanya diorang nie tak keje ker?

Salah satu budaya unik yang terdapat disitu ialah kebanyakan mereka memesan ikan tanpa nasi dan ikan tersebut diratah begitu saja.Memang berbeza dengan di Selangor dan Perlis.

Tambah terbaik bila ada Ajib dalam geng yang merupakan seorang pelajar jurusan kulinari dan pengalaman kerja hampir 8 tahun dalam bidang masakan jadi masalah pilih ikan memang tidak timbul.Kalau nak harapkan aku dan dua lagi mangkuk hayun tue memang zero knowledge pasal masakan tahu mentekedarah jer.


Yang sedang diratah Ajib itu ikan kerapu masak 3 rasa.


Air asam dia memang terbaik bila cicah dengan ikan jenahak bakar macam serasi sangat,macam blackcurrant dengan lemon.


Macam tak makan 100 tahun sekejap jer ikan tue tinggal tulang.Orang cakap nak ambik gambar kejap pun tak dihiraukan perangai masing-masing macam dubuk.

Aktiviti diteruskan lagi tapi kali ini konsep cari makan ditukar kepada konsep 999 macam dekat TV3.Habib selaku penunjuk arah sekali lagi membawa kami menerokai kegiatan sosial waktu malam di Melaka.

Gambar tidak sempat dirakamkan kerana berbahaya kepada krew tapi apa yang dapat disaksikan ialah kelibat pelacur tua menanti pelanggan,sekawan bapok gergasi dingorat mat rempit dan GRO melepak di depan kelab.Semuanya disaksikan penuh keinsafan dan kesyukuran kerana masih dijauhkan dari terlibat dengan perkara-perkara tersebut.Semoga mereka memperolehi keinsafan dan kesempatan bertaubat.

Pepatah ada mengatakan,burung pun tahu pulang ke sarang.Jadi apakejadahnya kami yang manusia tak reti balik? Lepas kena ayat pedih dari ibubapa masing-masing kami pun merangkak pulang hilang dalam kegelapan malam meninggalkan seribu kenangan indah di Melaka.




27 comments:

Ervina Razali June 27, 2010 at 12:58 AM  

pasni bwk ina jln2 cm ayg jln2 ngn mereka ok..
tamo bg alasan jauh...
lau tamo ina repot bomba..

Aku Beskot™ June 27, 2010 at 1:32 AM  

cume ade 1 soklan..
kuar darah x??

cracked bunny June 27, 2010 at 3:38 AM  

asl kalo kete je mesti pempuan.tak puas hati aku

N2kU June 27, 2010 at 8:13 AM  

hak hak.. peciter itali..
meh-meh join sapot spain lak

yusuf mujahidin ™ June 27, 2010 at 10:04 AM  

Aslmualaikum

sekali sekala roadtrip mcmni pn nice jugk..haha

eh, lepas itali kua ko skong mn lak?

tengku_fir21 June 27, 2010 at 11:18 AM  

huh...
pasangan songsang di melaka haha...
weih ko tahu tk pesal awek tu blah/

per kes italy..boooooo

pinkiss June 27, 2010 at 1:27 PM  

wah.. best betul jalan2 cari makan tu.

erinazrina June 28, 2010 at 9:29 AM  

coconut shake macam menarik!

☺[ai][sUmi]☺Chan June 28, 2010 at 11:57 AM  

wah wahhh~ nih betul2 jalan nih...

ieQa sWetLuv June 30, 2010 at 11:49 AM  

coconut shake memang marvellous..

pecah dara?? haishh~

~mellankolia~ June 30, 2010 at 6:08 PM  

dem gler aksi lu kne belasah dgn mesin urut tuh...lu bahagia ke derita weyh...tak bleh blah dow...

Mohd Fakhrurazi Jamaludin July 1, 2010 at 2:20 AM  

Ervina:Keh Keh.Boleh jer sayang.Janji separuh perjalanan sayang drive.Err...minyak support!

Zul:Hahaha.Tak tahu.Darah apa nie wei?Aku tak kahwin lagi la.Hahaha

Sha:Kang kalau aku tulis pecah teruna kang bersepah pulak gay masuk blog aku.Dah la semua yang pegi tue jantan.Keh Keh.Meh la bagitahu camne nak kasi puas kau?Hahaha

N2Ku:Arghh! Taknak.Aku nak sokong German.Hahaha.

Yusuf:Really nice.Hahaha.Aku sokong German.Tengok diorang punya taktikal macam perang dunia.

Tengku:Pasal kitaorang sangat kacak.Hahaha.Takpe.Cuba lagi 4 tahun kemudian wahai Itali

Pinkiss:Ish nie msti suka makan nie.Hahaha.

Erina:Menarik,Tertarik,Kau memang deboomm!!

Sumi:Sekali-sekala.Bukan selalu.Eh,macam selalu jer.Hahaha.

Ieqa:Minyak kelapa dara?Hahaha

Raihana:Aku sakit.Hahaha.Sungguh tak nice la mesin tue.Padan la murah.Hahaha

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